One of the things I do while obsessively trying to broaden my blog readership, spread the angry meme and take over the world is check to see what search terms land people on my blog. Predictable enough, many of the searches include some variant of "angry" but some of criteria that result in search engines pointing people here are more intriguing, if not downright funny.
No surprises that writing about Stephen Colbert in the last week has been good for attracting readers although this has more been the case with blog aggregators like Technorati than search engines like Google. I hope I haven't been too cynical on this front – the longer pieces I've written have been heartfelt and I've kept the jokey littering of Stephen Colbert keywords and tags to a minimum. Except then. That double reference to Stephen Colbert was a little gratuitous. So was that. Anyway, join the Church of Colbert.
Some other search terms that have given me a smile (or puzzled me) are:
"Words to use when angry" – I hope they meant angry words to use for venting, they're in the right place for that. If they were looking for calming words, they're shit out of luck.
"How to calm angry teenagers" – ummm, sorry, you fucked up there. I'm no help to you on that front.
"Why does a year have 365 days?" – this one threw me for a while. Then I worked out it was from the blog title. There were four variations on this so I suspected this may have been some sort of school project somewhere. If that was the case, those kids were probably all suspended for visiting an obscene site.
"guys fucking parents" – oooookay. I really don't think I want to meet that person.
Search engines are weird.