Whining office morons win again

I little while ago I blogged about a fantastic instance of lateral thinking winning the day in the office where I work.  Essentially there was a blind corner and nobody could figure out how to make it safe.  Then came the master stroke of putting a large pot plant on the corner which forced people slow down and walk around the corner rather than cutting around quickly and causing collisions.

At the time I noted that there was one whiner who complained they would run into the plant.  Apparently they are so fucking stupid they think they are more likely to suffer trauma from running into a two metre rubber plant (that you could not possibly fail to notice no matter how fucking stupid you are) than from someone they can’t see coming around the corner holding a hot coffee.  Nobody paid attention to them.

Or so I thought.

This week the big plant was taken away and replaced with a small plant because of the complaints of this one fucked-up loser.  This is the worst of both worlds: there’s still an obstacle on the corner but it’s below your natural line of sight so it’s a fucking hazard rather than a help.  The idiot calls this a “compromise” but I call it fucking moronic.  A compromise is where both sides gain something.  This is just a whiny control freak who couldn’t deal with not getting their way.

So far this week I’ve bashed my shin on the pot three times and had half a dozen near misses with people coming around the corner because the small plant does nothing to encourage you to take the corner wide and slowly.

If I get my way there’s going to be a MUCH bigger pot there because I’m going to kill this bastard and I’ll need somewhere to stash the body.  It’s the perfect solution – the only way this person could possibly be of any use to society is as compost.



Filed under Work

8 responses to “Whining office morons win again

  1. Lovin’ it! You kick ass, Mr!

  2. Lol! Wait, nobody thought about installing a small mirror or any other reflective surface? Ô_o

  3. Why don’t they paint a mural on the wall of a collision between someone with a hot cup of coffee and someone else walking along reading a report or something, both of them get hideously scalded and rushed to the hospital in the next scene. You can even put their conversation in bubbles… or would that distract people too much do you think?

  4. Salamaat,
    hahaha you are brilliant Mr. Angry. Nothing like a nice office diss, to start my day with a laugh!

  5. I home the whiney ass is the person that gets the whole pot of coffee right in his crotch. 😀

  6. Daniel: thanks!

    z-lot: in the original post https://angryaussie.wordpress.com/2006/11/03/lateral-thinking-in-action/
    I detailed the various attempts to solve the problem including putting a parabolic mirror on the ceiling (the only practical surface for a mirror). the trouble is, nobody walks around looking at the ceiling.

    Michelle: that’s an awesome idea but I know I’d be distracted by it

    Maliha: Salamaat, we all have our office problems!

    Sandra: if there’s any justice that will happen.

    engtech: nice link! 😀

  7. Office problems, don’t we have them all. From the school not being cleaned to the little kids always running in the hallways.

    Cubicle time sucks, in my opinion, you need to make it more fun by causing a bit of mayem.

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