As I was being subjected to the usual cavalcade of idiots on the drive in to work this morning, I came up with a potential solution. I’m going to be writing up a formal proposal for this idea to submit to the federal government because it will require the creation of a new public holiday. This holiday will be known as “No Road Rules Day”.
On No Road Rules Day there will, of course, be no road rules. There will also be no repercussions for any automotive transgressions committed on this day. Speed all your want. Cause all the multi-car pile-ups you like. Ignore traffic lights. There will be no rules.
There will also be no ambulances.
I’m going to present this proposal as a chance for all the anti-social hoons to get their aggressive tendencies out of their systems but it will actually be an opportunity to see Darwinism in action. Sensible people will spend the day safely indoors. Fuckwits will be out in huge numbers being even bigger fuckwits than normal. Many of them will inevitably die, resulting in a noticeable improvement in the gene pool.
At the end of the day, the wreckage and corpses will be scooped up by specially designed dump trucks. Normal people will wake to a new day with clean streets. And on the way to work, everyone will be thinking the same thing:
“Wow, traffic’s way better than usual today.”