I really hate spammers. The types who are running botnets are scum. I don’t have to worry about that too much on this blog, thanks to the magic of Akismet. But then there’s YouTube. It’s all but overrun with spam. I can’t work out why the company (Google) that has a product with one of the best spam filters (Gmail) also has a product with one of the most fucked (YouTube).
The deluge of anonymous spam on YT really pisses me off, it feels like I have to deal with as many spam as I do legitimate comments. Usually these take the form of comments on videos but occasionally they spill over into YT’s “email” message system. I got one last night that made me just about blow a fuse. Seriously. Even by my standards I was fucking pissed off.
The message proclaimed the wonderful news that YT meetup gifts were now available. Now, as I have made clear here, I am one of the people organising the YT meetups in Australia. So to receive a spam exhorting me to buy some really shitty t-shirts to “promote” the gatherings pissed me off mightily. The blatantly misleading nature of the spam (which many people have received) makes it sounds like this is official apparel.
Lines like “T-shirts for the YT Meetup Dec. 1 in Melbourne OZ are now available” are deliberately designed to sound official while giving the scum-sucking weasel wiggle room to say “I never explicitly claimed they were official t-shirts.” I know this is actually a small example of exactly how depraved people can be in the pursuit of money but still… this motherfucker is doing it to me! He’s trying to profit from my work while contributing nothing in return. So I retaliated in the only way I could:
This piece of shit had better hope I never find him.
Angry 365 Days a Year 
There’s a market there, perhaps you should be selling something.
Also, you need some sort of insult thesaurus, your vitriol would be more effective if I wasn’t sitting here thinking: “Didn’t he say scum-sucking already?”
Anyway, I’ve got 2 gazillion penis enlargement e-mails to send out, so I can’t stop. They’re individually hand-crafted in our workshops. From the spam company that cares… about your erectile dysfunction.
Wow, you really were angry in this one – quite rightly too.
I’m sure you get a ludicrous amount of spam, but it’s pretty annoying to just get a little when you’re small time, and you think “yay! I got a comment”, or something like that and it turns out to be someone who happens to want to help you meet singles and somehow totally missed the point of your post or whatever. Fuckers! Actually on youtube I just started uploading a few things so I don’t get much action, but the first ever person who added me as a friend or whatever, just so happens to be someone without any videos or profile but a link to some dating site, so I’m assuming they don’t really want to be friends with me. Oh well.
If you do find this guy and kill him, would you please let me know? I’d like to market the T-shirts. Maybe some bumper stickers as well.
Heh I’ve uninstalled all my third party anti-spyware.
So far this video has been a very effective spam deterrent. Thank you for your help.
Ha..ha..ha.ha… You said it again!! Spam..spam..spam.. Spam…. Spam… SPAM!!! Green eggs and spam? Spam, Spam & Spam??
Eggs, bacon and spam?
Oh wait… you aren’t talking about the GOOD kind of spam, are ya? 😉
Massif: If I wasn’t working alone on a budget of $0 I’d buy an insult thesaurus
Paul: damn straight!
Michelle: the “friends” thin on YT is little more than an avenue for spam
Moonbeam: I think marketing his murder would be popular
Goatsoup: I WISH I could scare them all away
Cinnkitty: you’re saying there’s a *good* spam? (I’d rather eat the stuff in my inbox than the stuff in supermarkets)
Hey… don’t knock a food product that has the same shelf life as a radioactive blast….. we’ll *ALL* be eating Spam then… ha..ha..ha…! 🙂
Hmmm…I wonder if those canned Rum cakes get MORE alcoholic as they age?? (note to self… buy more canned rum cakes for the fall out shelter…) hee…hee…
This is selfish of me, I know, but I hope you do find him. And that you have a video camera with you at the time.