Have you ever been in that weird situation where you have to work with someone who looks like someone you don’t like? I’m facing that at the moment, by which I mean there’s a guy at work who bears a striking resemblance to a person (from the online world) I can’t stand. They aren’t twins by any means but the guy at work could easily be the younger brother of the online troll.
This has two unfortunate effects. First, every time I pass this guy at work I’m reminded of a fuckwit I’d rather not waste time thinking about. Second, every time he says something I have to fight the urge to respond “What the fuck would you know? You’re just some pathetic troll who wastes his days attacking people who are actually trying to do something worthwhile!”
I have a suspicion that were I actually to make that outburst, it would be a career-limiting move.
It actually reminds of a situation I had years ago in a shared house where I really, really, REALLY didn’t like one of my housemates. It was pointed out to me that this housemate bore a striking resemblance to the actor Charles Dance. This proved to be a very interesting discovery to make because it turns out Charles Dance gets killed in nearly every movie he’s in.
He goes in a satisfying variety of ways too. Sometimes he’s shot, other times he’s stabbed, blown up, eviscerated by an alien or falls to his death. Hell, in one movie he even had a statue dropped on him. It’s incredibly cathartic to watch a convincing stand-in for someone you don’t suffer a cavalcade of painful deaths.
This guy actually went from being a source of depression to a major source of entertainment. Any time he acted like a total dick (usually several times a week) the situation could be remedied by whacking on a Charles Dance movie. Followed by a long household discussion on our favourite way to see him die.