A few years ago I made this video where I came up with some creative ways to tell someone you don’t give a fuck about them:
It’s one of my more popular videos – apparently people are always looking for creative ways to get rid of annoying idiots. Lately I have had many requests for MORE! I’ve been building up to it for a while and I thought I’d try out some options here on the blog before I made it into another video. If you get in quick with comments (and I like them) your responses might end up being part of the video.
Without further ado, here are some more ways to tell someone you don’t give a fuck about them:
- A recently discovered tribe in the Amazon had had no contact with the outside word and had no idea anybody existed outside their valley. It turns out they give more of a fuck about you than I do.
- I’d like to introduce you to Bob, we hired him specifically to give a fuck about you because none of us do and we want you to leave us the fuck alone. But he committed suicide. So there’s still nobody who gives a fuck about you.
- I started the day with a dozen fucks. After a day of dealing with your bullshit I still has 12 fucks left. How many fucks did I give about you today?
- There are electron microscopes that can find molecules less than a nanometre wide – but they can’t find any fucks I give about you.
- Astronomers have mapped the universe out to two billion light years. They haven’t found any fucks I give about you.
- Some mayflies have a life span of only half an hour – that’s approximately 30 minutes longer than the lifespan of any fuck I’ve ever given about you.
- That was close – I almost gave a fuck about you. Turns out I just needed to fart.
I feel this list is still to be added to before I commit it to video. Please help!