Tag Archives: racing

Crushing hoons

Hoon is a fun word.  I don’t know if it used anywhere else in the world but in Australia it’s used to describe hooligans.  Trouble-makers.  Loud mouths.  Idiots.  It’s often used specifically to describe morons who drive like they’re trying to over-compensate for their tiny penises and get involved in illegal street racing.

Because going after these dorks is a sure-fire vote winner (“law and order” never goes out of style) politicians are always proposing new laws to punish these miscreants.  Each new edict tends to get promoted as an “anti-hoon” law which has a nice ring to it.

In the news at the moment is a proposal by the NSW government to actually crush the cars of hoons convicted of illegal street racing.  I know there are similar laws around the world but I like the twist they’re adding to this one.  They aren’t simply crushing the cars into cubes.  They’re actually using them for crash tests.  And the bit I really like is that they’re planning to video the crushing and put the videos online.

That’s a good start but I have an idea for taking it one step further…

Another possible variant is to strap the worst of these morons into their stupid penis compensators and use them as crash test dummies.  It would be the first time in their lives that most of them have been useful.

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